“We create industry-leading solutions using cutting-edge best practices to position our clients as the foremost experts in their respective fields.”
Any idea what this company does? I’m guessing no.
I’m not sure why so many brochures, websites and other marketing materials are written this way. Best guess: A company places a lot of importance on its “About Us” blurb, and most companies probably think the best way to handle such sensitive material is to put it through a committee of Very Important Executives at the Company.
But what often happens is that each committee member chips away at the core message — “can we change ‘best’ to ‘industry-leading?'” — until all that’s left is a bunch of corporate nonsense.
Suggestion: Write to me — your website visitor, your prospect, your customer. Even if your About Us blurb reads a little less formally, your potential customers — human beings — will enjoy and respond to it far more positively than this doublespeak gibberish.
Another good rule: When you’re writing, ask yourself if you’d say the words in conversation. If someone sitting next to you on a plane asked what your company did, would you tell them, “We’re the premier corporate intelligence solution using best-of-breed technology?” Now, imagine that person not sitting next to you on a plane — but visiting your website. Why would you write to her that way?
Remember: You say half as much with doublespeak.